Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Cool Shades

Dear Mr. Applicant,

I know you are excited that we are hiring. I know that you want to come in and impress. And what I know most of all, we don't have to hire you.

When you come in wearing your leather jacket and sporting the shades that match the Cadillac Escalade you borrowed from your dad you look like a tool. We are not impressed. Take off the sunglasses. What? are you on drugs and don't want me to see your eyes? Are you too cool to remove your shades in a building with limited light exposure?

We were not overwhelmed with excitement upon your introduction to us as God's gift to metal fabrication. And, before I was able to get a word out of my mouth you ask "how much do you pay?" Easy to answer "to you, Nothing! Get out!" My goodness, how long have you been out of work? Are you trying this hard because you've failed at all other approaches? Or do you really think you're that good?

Here is a suggestion; go to your local bookstore and pick up a copy of "What Color is Your Parachute". It might help you, it might not.

By the way, I shredded your resume as you walked out the door.

Best regards,

Schmo, who will not be hiring you.


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